Mindful Mamma's guide to pregnancy and birth

What is a 'Natural' Cesarean?

2010-09-07T18:04:00.002+01:00

I had a discussion with a good friend of mine today, when she came to the realisation that despite having a section she could still have maintained some level of control over her baby's journey into the world. She is 20 weeks pregnant with her third son and is looking forward to the birth and excited about the pregnancy, but for her last two births she had caesareans after not progressing at all. Her second child was born using HypnoBirthing and although she was very calm and focussed she just didn't progress.

This may be because of an accident she had when she was younger and not treated for properly, and so this time she is going to see a chiropractor and then make the decision on whether to have a caesarean or go for a normal birth again. If she does have a normal birth, then I'm going to be her birthing partner so I have all fingers and legs crossed that I can be there with her.

But while she was here I went through the research by Professor Fisk on 'natural' caesareans, some of which I posted on our Facebook page the other day. Natural seems a bit of paradox when talking about such an invasive surgical procedure, and I have seen some midwives splutter and cough on hearing the term. Yet Fisk's research shows that some methods of delivering a baby by caesarean can mimic the journey through the birth canal, for example by delaying cord clamping for as long as possible, reducing the amount of time the baby is separated from the mother, ensuring that there is skin to skin contact before weighing and that the mother is as comfortable as possible – surrounded by her own choice of music and wearing her own clothes.

However, many women, once they decide on a caesarean, reluctantly assume that that's it -they can hand over to the medical professionals, book a date and go into have their baby. Well that isn't it, there is so much more that can be done to ensure that baby's and mums have a better birth experience. It's not that new a phenomenon and there have been articles published in The Times, The Guardian and in the BBC about steps some hospitals in the UK are taking to make caesareans less traumatic for mum and baby.

Preparation should not just focus on the day but also taking action to ensure that the there is some emotional and mental antenatal preparation for your baby's birth, even if it will be surgical is hugely important. Antenatally, the time that the baby has in the womb is a vital 9 months - that environment is one in which he begins to lay out his neurological map and experiences emotions and feelings. From what I have seen in my antenatal classes - there is no doubt about it baby responds when the mums are calm. In the middle of relaxation exercises there is joy and laughter all around as they experience thier babies move almost in unison! Women that have birthed using mind and body techniques have practised these techniques many weeks in the run up to the birth so that the baby benefits from that positive imprint during its time in the womb.

This is just as important to a baby that is going to be born surgically as a baby born naturally. Time spent preparing beforehand can really make a difference to your baby and to how you emotionally prepare for parenthood.

When having a caesarean, some women decide to have small rituals the day before to welcome the baby into the family, just sitting quietly, or perhaps with music, singing, reading and spending some close and loving time with thier family in preparation.

Many will have discussed beforehand with their caregiver what their intentions on the day are, so that they know what to expect and feel reassured that the birth is going to be as gentle as possible for the baby.

Here is a list of things you may want to discuss with your surgeon and midwife before.

Request you wear your own clothing
Bring your own music in
Lower the drape after uterine incision so that you can see your baby being born
Allow the baby to breathe while the body is still in utero mimicking birth
Delay cord clamping as long as possible.
Baby can be passed directly to the mother.
Baby only weighed after surgery is finished.

So my friend now feels comforted and relieved that she can do something to ease this baby's journey into the world even if it is surgical. Even so I have all fingers and toes crossed for a normal birth so that I can be there!

Nature Nurtures Birth

2010-09-03T20:22:00.003+01:00

OMG OMG OMG.

How excited can I get about ducklings? Two have hatched today in my garden. I saw their dark brown fluffy bodies and beautiful shiny eyes, and heard their cute cheep cheep. Seeing them peer out from their nest was almost as lovely as seeing a new baby born, looking up from her mother’s breast. (Actually, newly hatched ducklings are fluffier and less gooey – but not nearly so emotionally heartwarming).

We’ve had ducks for a while. I wanted to hatch some, and I wanted it to be as natural as possible. I knew that newly hatched ducklings imprint onto that which they see move, so they need their mummy around when they hatch, in order to follow mummy duck around the garden. I didn’t want ducklings in a box. I wanted them stumbling over stones and rocks, following mummy frantically and freely.

So we waited. And waited. No signs. These ducks have been bred for eggs, not breeding, so I guessed that their natural instincts had been bred out. And I wondered, while putting the washing out, how quickly instinctive birth can be lost after generations of caesarean sections?

Anyhow, we tried all sorts of other things. Getting chicken hens to sit on the eggs, using a home made incubator, using a posh incubator. To no avail.

Then, suddenly, mummy had made her very own nest, and was sitting on nine eggs! It wasn’t where we wanted her to be – but she was so well hidden that we realised she wasn’t in danger from foxes. We were delighted. But not as delighted as we are now that they have also hatched!

Clever mummy. And to think that we lost faith in mother nature and her ability to create fabulous new life just like that! Our classes help us to put that faith back, and as a doula, I have to work at keeping the faith. I can’t believe I let it waiver with my mummy duck. She has taught me to keep the trust no matter what the situation!

Pregnant? Think Twice About The Birth

2010-09-02T13:36:00.002+01:00

Did you know that how your baby is born can have a significant effect on her emotional and psychological makeup as an adult? Everything she registers and feels during her initial entry into the world will be memorised and can influence the rest of her life. Elena Tonetti, an advocate of conscious birth, refers to this as “limbic imprint”. Leslie Temple-Thurston, a teacher of enlightenment, refers to this as “negative or positive imprinting”. The greater the birth trauma, especially through unnecessary or even necessary intervention, the greater the negative birth imprint.

Babies are extremely sensitive, and those born to intervention and rough handling can find the experience extremely shocking and abusive, even if birth attendees consider the handling normal (Leslie Temple-Thurston). While babies may forget their ordeal in the hours and days that follow, the memory of the experience is held deep within them and doesn’t spontaneously go away. Unless babies are helped to release the stress of this imprinting (Aletha Solter, The Aware Baby), it (stress and imprinting) stays with them for the rest of their lives whether they are conscious of it or not. This is because during birth the limbic system registers all of the sensations and emotions around the experience of birth, and the memory of it lives in the body for the rest of our lives whether we are conscious of this or not.

Elena Tonetti says that “if our first impressions of being in the body are anything less than loving ([violating], painful, frightening, lonely...) then that “anything” imprints as a valid experience of love. It is immediately coded into our nervous system as a “comfort zone”, acting as a surrogate for the love and nurturing [that we expect to receive], regardless of how painful, frustrating and undesirable it actually was. And in the future, as adults, we will unconsciously, automatically recreate the conditions that were imprinted [into us] at birth and through our early childhood” (The Limbic Imprint by Elena Tonetti).

If birth trauma is extreme, a baby’s first experience of life will feel like he has entered a dangerous and violent world (Leslie Temple-Thurston). Chances are good that the psychological conditioning he receives, because of his experience at birth, will also be extreme. Abuse and trauma at birth imprints a baby with tremendous shock and fear (Leslie Temple-Thurston). If a baby feels disempowered or victimised at birth, either through rough handling by less than sensitive birth attendees, or as a result of mechanical intervention, he will unconsciously try to recreate this experience in later life either by becoming a perpetrator of abuse himself, or by allowing others to abuse him. A large body of evidence exists to show that complications during delivery are associated with physical conditions and behavioural disorders in later life. Birth trauma has been shown to be associated with a range of problems including addictions, poor problem-solving skills, short attention span, low self-esteem, inability to be empathetic and responsible and a host of physical health problems (www.birthpsychology.com).

So how we birth our babies clearly has a considerable influence on the kinds of people they become and has a lasting impact on how they will function in the world. This isn’t something to be taken lightly. How many of us spend time considering the possible emotional and behavioural effects that birth can have on our children’s lives? Unfortunately we live in a culture where the emotional and psychological impact of the birth experience on a baby is not taken seriously or really even understood. Birth is usually regarded as a physical, medical experience (often emergency), and the instinctive, natural and spiritual component is seriously disregarded. As a result many women feel let down by their birth experiences, and some even go as far as enduring traumatic births, often unnecessarily, and suffer consequent post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) long after the birth (Birth Trauma Association, www.birthtraumaassociation.org.uk).

Birthing a baby is not “routine procedure” – it is a completely unique and sacred moment in time. It is possible to have a natural, gentle, healthy and positive birthing experience, and if you are expecting a baby I would say that you are entitled to it. In most cases in this day and age, a gentle, natural birth requires disciplined preparation and is not usually handed to us on a plate. In fact, entering a birthing field consciously (fully present, aware and unmedicated) requires serious mental and emotional preparation. And contrary to popular belief, with proper guidance and support this is possible for a considerable number of expecting couples. In most cases, both mums and dads need to be mentally and emotionally prepared for the birth of their babies in order for the birth experience to be a healthy, gentle and positive one. According to Elena Tonetti, many delivery complications are the direct result of family psychological problems that have not been resolved. She suggests that it is crucial to the quality of the birthing experience that these dramas are dealt with before the due date (www.birthintobeing.com).

With adequate preparation we as parents have the opportunity to soften the birthing experience for our babies and help them enter the world with a more favourable first imprint. With proper preparation we can have gentle birth experiences and control to an extent how their nervous systems will be limbically imprinted. In many cases traumatic births can be avoided if the necessary mental and emotional preparation has taken place.

When we decide to have children, we enter a sacred contract with them agreeing to be custodians of their emotional well-being. It is of paramount importance to the future emotional health of our children that we begin this responsibility right at the beginning – at that pivotal point of entry into the world. Because when a baby is born gently into a loving environment, the shock and fear factor is greatly reduced, and this softer imprint stays with her for the rest of her life.

Happy Birthing!

10 Steps to the Ideal Birth Environment

2010-08-07T12:50:00.003+01:00

This weekend I taught the Nottingham one day hypnobirthing class in a venue that I've only taught in a couple of times, and a long time ago. Even though the environment was lovely and I'd taught there before it was a little unfamiliar to me. So I prepared a little bit more before the day, phoned up and checked that everything was there that I needed, only to find that there was a birthday party scheduled to take place the same day! But it wasn't my home it was someone else's and I had to go with the flow. To be honest it made me feel a little anxious, what about the noise? How would I time all the relaxation work?

To minimise stress I packed the car the night before, so I could just get up and drive to the Nottingham hypnobirthing class early and familiarise myself with the layout; which I did, and managed to set it all up and take some time out to focus before the class started to arrive. It turned out that the birthday party was fine, there wasn't too much noise and the day ran smoothly. However, I have no doubt that this is because I prepared so well beforehand and made sure that I had everything that I needed to help things run as smoothly as possible, even in an environment that is unfamiliar.

Birth is not dissimilar, environment is really important, being surrounded by familiar things, knowing you have everything you need allows the birthing mother to completely switch off and focus on what she will be doing best – birthing baby.

One of the things we spent a lot of time on in this antenatal class is about how to get your birth environment right. What do I mean by right? Isn't it ok to just roll up and give birth wherever? Theoretically yes, but from a psychological perspective a woman birthing needs to be an environment where she feels completely safe and secure, a place that is above all private. A place where she is uninterrupted, where she is able to focus on birthing the baby, not distracted by unfamiliar noises or smells or people coming and going.

All women have three choices on where to give birth, home, hospital or birthing centre. Every woman has a right to one of these choices. In our classes we spend a good amount of time talking about the pros and cons of each environment and how a mother can create the perfect environment for birth.Did you know that you can pick any place you wish? Some women we teach would rather drive 30/40 minutes from Nottingham to Darley Dale, Grantham or Melton, to give birth at a birthing centre.

Why is the birth environment important? Being in a birth environment that is familiar mitigates stress, and increases a sense of belonging, a sense of security. It's not just that the environment is familiar , but that the environment is right for the purpose intended.

Birth is a very private event, the most important hormone for birth, Oxytocin, is secreted during birth and stimlates the production of the body's natural analgesia. It's the same hormone that makes an appearance during sex. Oxytocin is a shy hormone and just as a woman needs to feel private, secure and safe for sex, she needs to feel unobserved, safe and secure during birth. If there is anything that threatens a women at all during birth she produces adrenaline which reduces the amount of Oxytocin. the hormone that stimulates the production of the body's natural analgesia.

These 'threats' can be as minor as a door opening into the room, the light being switched on, a loud noise from another room nearby, the smell of anesthetic in the hospital or even the possiblity of having an injection. These can all stimulate the threat system and slow things down.

Making the birth environment as conducive to birth as possible is hugely important and can often be the key to a good birth.

Home may be the most familiar secure environment for many women and it is true statistically that if you are low risk and choose to give birth at home you are at lower risk of intervention. However, for many reasons women choose to give birth in hospital, and although it's harder it is still possible to create a comfortable and secure birthing environment.

Here are our ten steps to creating your best birthing environment:

If going into hospital try and get a tour of the unit beforehand, or at the very least familiarize yourself with the route and the reception area. This will reduce any unconscious anxiety on the day.
Make sure that the lights are dimmed and low. Think about the type of environment you would like to sleep in and try and emulate that.
Ask for fewer interruptions. Ideally on your birth plan give permission to the midwives upfront to listen to the baby with a Doppler whenever they need to, that way you won't be interrupted for permission every 15/20 minutes - if you are using deep relaxation techniques this is very important.
Take your own pillow in. Not only will the scent on the pillow remind you of your bed, a safe secure place and trigger a deep sense of calm in your mind and in your body, but on a practical note pillows are hard to come by in maternity units!
Have some relaxation music, or our CD to help you relax.
Use aromatherapy oils (many hospitals now offer this service)
Make sure that your birthing partner and you have discussed your options for birth beforehand so you are confident that he/she can advocate on your behalf and that he/she understands and feels secure in their role as birthing partner.
Stimulate oxytocin! Take something from a room at home that you love and feel very relaxed in, or a photo that makes you smile and feel happy whenever you look at it. Perhaps a portable DVD player with some comedy films/shows. (remember batteries!)
Move any clocks or anything related to time from the mother's view and avoid 'clockwatching'. A birthing mother when she is properly in her birthing zone will experience what is known as time distortion. Meaning that she will be unaware of time passing, many women who have used hypnobirthing will think that their labour was much quicker than it really was.
Keep the room calm, anxiety is contagious and if your birthing partner is anxious you will pick up on that anxiety.

Ten Psychological Tips for Coping with a Newborn Baby

2010-06-01T10:07:00.001+01:00

You’ve had so much advice, it’s left you reeling in confusion. Every-one else seems to know exactly what you should do, but this doesn’t really help you to feel in control of the tiredness and emotional changes taking place. Here are some psychological tips to help you through those turbulent early days.

1. Never say “I have done nothing today”. You’ve been there for your baby. You’ve been instantly interruptible (probably a new skill for you), and instantly available for soothing, comfort and nutrition. Research shows that soothing and comfort are as powerful for baby’s well being as food.
2. Never strive to be perfect, always good enough. On a bad day, say to yourself “I was good enough, and that is good enough”.
3. On a good day, capture the moment and bank it in your memory. Remember how special you are, to be a mum (don't try this on a bad day).
4. Gather friends around you – especially ones with little babies too. Any-one else will have forgotten what it’s really like, and it’s the biggest protector against postnatal depression.
5. Never chastise yourself for needing sleep, rest, a break, a night out, a rant, or whatever you need. Find a way to get it, because it will strengthen you and help you be a good enough mum.
6. Being “mindful” is a psychological term which is used to deal with frustration and low mood. It means focusing on what this feels like, now, and moving away from thoughts of later, or tomorrow such as things that need doing. So while you are cuddling your baby, focus on the cuddle, the feel of it, the warmth, the movement as your baby breathes etc. Push away any thoughts of what needs doing and when. Just “be” with the here and now. Practice this for ten minutes each day and you will realize how powerful it is.
7. Prolactin (the mothering hormone) makes you a little more anxious, a little more irritable, and more submissive and loving. So never try to be all giving and all loving – there will have to be some irritability and anxiety thrown in. We’re back to never trying to be perfect!
8. The effects of prolactin, coupled with a striving for perfection may mean that you find it hard to let your partner do his bit with baby. However, if you want him to help you when the baby is older and if you want him to understand why you feel so drained and why the house is in a mess, then start to give him time alone with baby now. How else will he become confident and competent with his baby?
9.
If you begin to feel that you aren’t coping and that you are not okay within yourself, or if others start to tell you so, don’t hesitate to see you GP or Health Visitor, or find a counsellor. Post natal depression passes much quicker with help and support, and no one deserves to feel awful, so why not go and get the support to help yourself through it sooner rather than later.
10.
This isn't a psychological tip for mum, but it is about baby's psychology. While I don't normally advise about what to buy (there isn't really very much that baby needs), I am going to mention the Tummy Tub for your newborn baby. Here's why http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Hnonw1jZDo

The Importance of Being Dad

2010-03-04T13:05:00.002Z

How can I write a blog this month without mentioning the current series on Channel 4, 'One Born Every Minute'?

I missed the bulk of the first two, as my internet connection is so slow, but after watching the 3^rd I'm grateful to Talk Talk for sparing me the ignominy of some of the husbands that I watched as they 'supported' their wives giving birth.

Watching the 3^rd episode of this programme, I watched aghast as a husband bullied his wife while she was in labour. She was squatting on the floor, while he berated her for wanting a natural birth over a section (she was a VBAC – Vaginal Birth Following Caesarean) and he wanted to know what she was going to do as he didn't want to be there all night. Not to mention the dad who locked his wife in the toilet while she was having a contraction.

It really was a sight to behold and my heart goes out to both the mum and the midwife, Dominique, who was fantastic, calm and encouraging in the face of a real challenge. That the mum achieved a VBAC was I think down to her and the fact that she was caseloading midwife (the same midwife that followed the mother through antenatal care and the birth), giving the mum a sense of stability and familiarity.

However, despite me wanting to the throw my remote control at that dad, I also felt sorry for him, as his reaction to the situation was likely to have been driven by helplessness, fear and lack of knowledge.

My only experience of dads to be and birthing partners are those who choose to come on the course - those that want to understand what is happening so they can respectfully and knowledgeably support their partner. But who also realise that the opportunity to find more is out there, that there are classes that help him to understand what is happening and what he can do to help.

Last year, Michel Odent, a French Obstetrician renowned for his work on normal birth, wrote a provocative article where he categorically stated that men should not be in the birthing room. Lots of debate ensued online, with people agreeing or vehemently opposed- we sit somewhere in the middle and believe that men should be there, but only, if they want to be there and if they are free of anxiety and fear. Let's face it, we've done a 360° turn in the last 40 years, from men down the pub or outside awaiting the news, to being absolutely expected to be in the birthing room – that's a big shift and a big ask of men, who are excluded from the majority of antenatal care, with at the most access to an NHS or NCT class.

So it's no surprise that some men who feel in the dark and disassociated from the pregnancy, and the birth suddenly find themselves into the uniquely intense experience of the birth itself without really knowing how to help. In fact many men on our classes say that the lack of knowledge or understanding of what is going on is what worries them as well as “seeing their partner in pain, and not being able to do anything about it.”

We turn this statement totally on its head in our classes, and teach the dad to be that he too has an important role, more than he might ever imagine, and that the birth can be empowering, and life changing for him as well. We also give them knowledge and techniques to support mum so he does know what to do.

We address the issue of fear in the birthing partner and enable couples to see that fear and anxiety are contagious. If dad is pacing up and down, biting his nails, or is restless it demonstrates to the mum that he is outwardly anxious, but there are also small ideomotor signals, small unconscious movements and gestures, driven by the subconscious, that the birthing mother can pick up subconsciously which can effect her birth.

We help the dad to make positive shifts in his confidence and belief that his wife or partner knows what to do instinctively and that she doesn't need rescuing from the situation. Most importantly he knows what is happening, why is is happening and what to do about it.

Remember always that at the birth, it's not just a baby being born, but a mother and a father too. Come on dads, do your bit, learn how to support your partner, and give her a strong shoulder to lean on physically and spiritually during birth and perhaps you'll find hidden depths that you never knew you had.

So Who's the Professional Here?

2010-01-11T14:15:00.004Z

This months blog is courtesy of one of my recent clients, a couple were constantly coming up with great ideas to support the birth that they wanted. Thanks for letting me use this for the blog!

We have talked a lot about the law of attraction and the importance of a women trusting in her instincts about how and where she wants to birth. In one of their sessions, this mum to be mentioned that she had been fending off comments from colleagues at work who questioned her choices about the homebirth she wished to have by telling her "you need to be where it's safe", "in a hospital surrounded by professionals." She turned to them and said" But I am a professional"!

Brilliant. And of course she's right. Women are 100% qualified for the job of giving birth! A woman giving birth, can tune into her body, is able to instinctively move to help her baby's journey and will often know what she or the baby needs. Just listening to that inner voice, the subconscious, allows the mother to let go consciously and for instinct to take over.

Control is often an issue that come up in classes when we talk about letting go, but it's not about losing control. There is no doubt that people come to our classes because they want to feel in control, it's obvious to us that there is a real issue around losing control, whether it's the birthing mother thinking that she will lose control of herself or either the mother or her partner's fear of losing control to medical teams over the course of the birth.

This is interesting to us, because it demonstrates the sense of threat that is triggered by the instinctive need to be in control, to be alert, armed and aware. This threat is actually the one thing that really can inhibit the process of birth as it keeps the conscious mind, engaged and alert when really it should be slumbering. It's also a response that is triggered by the need to protect the baby and suggests "If I am not in control of the situation how can I protect my baby".

What our classes teach you is how to become more consciously aware of what those threats are prior to the birth and to build the confidence of you and your birthing partner. They also teach that control is paradoxically about allowing yourself to let go. Every woman in the birthing room chooses whether she can give herself over the birthing body, but when she does give herself over to the birthing body, who is in control? Yes, she is of course!

Trusting that the subconscious contains everything you need to birth gently, and that the conscious mind, the logical mind, has been allowed to just drift off for a while is about feeling secure in your knowledge of the birth process and the belief that you know how to birth.

Remember, every woman births differently and you are the absolute professional when it comes to your birth!

Peace on Earth Begins with Birth

2010-01-09T17:25:00.003Z

"When I was pregnant, I knew I trusted nature’s way, and that I didn’t want drugs or intervention. Our classes are designed to help you if you feel the same way. However, myself and a lot of “my” mums do accept Syntometrine – the injection that comes after baby is born to help the placenta come out nice and quickly. After your baby has been born, you’re on such a high and relieved, that you don’t care. And I remember thinking “well, baby isn’t getting any of it, so what the heck”.

When people ask my advice about taking Syntometrine, I usually sit on the fence, because there isn’t the research out there to support any views that I might have on it. Until now. There was one time however, when a mum looked at me just after she had had her baby, and said “shall I just have it?” I said “you have done so amazingly, doing this completely naturally, do you really want a drug now?” in a kind of “are you crazy” tone of voice. She declined. I surprised myself – I don’t usually throw my opinion on my clients. I guide and help them make their own decision. But I knew this woman – she had worked so hard, with such grace and determination, that I simply knew it wasn’t the right choice for her.

In class, I sometimes say that if you have birthed your baby completely naturally, why not go the whole hog, and stay natural? I also sometimes say that IN THEORY it could affect your oxytocin levels – but there is no research out there to support that. Until now.

Research has now come out of the Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology to suggest that Syntometrine might impact on breastfeeding rates 48 hours after birth. This makes so much sense. If you inject synthetic oxytocin into your system, your brain registers its presence, and tones down the amount that it generates naturally. As you know if you have come to our classes, natural oxytocin is the love hormone – important for bonding and breastfeeding. Synthetic oxytocin doesn’t cross the blood brain barrier, and so all it does is help the uterus clamp down.

So, as time goes on, and as research monies are used to assess nature over intervention, it seems to me that nature wins every single time. Nature really is amazing. So what I don’t get, as a psychologist, is why almost every culture intervenes? What is that about? Why have we got such a determination as a culture to get in there and make a mess of what nature does so beautifully? Are there any benefits of this, that have evolved over time? Michel Odent is the only person I know to even ask this (apart from some feminists maybe) and he has a fascinating suggestion. He argues that interrupting the process of birth creates a more aggressive society. You “imprint” individuation and aggression on the brain, in place of trust, cohesion and love. So, the cultures which interrupt nature’s way on a regular basis, create better human machines for ambition, drive and warfare. Cultures which don’t interrupt nature’s way create cohesive, loving, trusting groups that may get overturned like dodos did. My children are studying vikings at school. I would love to know how the Vikings birthed their children. One day, I might get time to find out more about it! In the meantime, have a wonderful, peaceful Christmas, knowing that we can trust nature to keep us all peaceful and loving!

Take a look: www.mindfulmamma.co.uk

Facebook page: http://tinyurl.com/mindfulmamma

The cyle of life and normal birth

2009-11-12T12:37:00.001Z

Last Friday, Sophie and I met with a group of midwives once again to spend a day teaching and talking about normal birth (which is midwife lingo for natural birth). What exactly counts as a natural birth varies a great deal.

Here at Mindful Mamma we like to consider it as a vaginal, drug free, no intervention birth, and most of our parents come to classes wanting exactly that. We asked the midwives how many of their clients have a natural birth, using our criteria. They said they had no idea – but less than 10%, if not closer to 3%.

They don’t often see that, even though they work on a normal birth unit, with very good outcome statistics. Sophie and I were surprised, because we hear about it all the time in the feedback we get from the couples who do our classes and I see it all the time in my work as a doula. However, the point is that we are all aiming for the same things, and it is lovely that the changes which Mindful Mamma would like to see in childbirth (less intervention, more empowered parents) are the same as those which midwives in the NHS want to see, and, of course, what you – the couples on our classes want to see too.

Most of you come to our classes needing to release your fears around birth, and to learn to trust the whole process. Some of you come to class needing to release your fears around birthing within the NHS, and learn to trust the procedures and trust the staff. It’s lovely that in our work, we can increasingly help you to release your fears about birthing within the NHS, because there are indeed, a lot of fabulous midwives out there, who are working within a system which increasingly enables and supports you in your choice of a normal, natural, birth.

While we mourn the losses and endings with our silences and poppies on Remembrance Sunday, it is nice to give thanks to our country for helping with the beginnings, focussing on helping babies to be born as nature intended, finally, after over 500 years.

The truth about hypnosis...

2009-11-12T12:30:00.002Z

I was watching my two boys playing this morning, when I heard one of them shout to the other, I’m hypnotizing you” and the other cry out “aggghhhh you villain” while strutting around like a robot under Machiavellian control. My children are 4 and 5 with little or no understanding of what I do for a living.

If they really believed I was a hypnotherapist and did hypnotize people for a living I’m sure not quite sure what it would do for their toddler psyches!

But where did they pick up the suggestion that hypnosis is evil, controlling and downright villainous? You’ve guessed it – the television. They don’t watch a lot, but it’s been a long holiday and and my eldest has recently graduated from Cebeebies to CITV and CBBC. Which means instead of Noddy, he gets Scooby Doo, Pokemon and Storm Hawks.

Watching a few of them with him I realized that the myth of hypnosis as a controlling force to be reckoned with was omnipresent in these cartoons. In Pokemon there is actually a move called Hypnosis with rules attached. Far too complicated for me to make any sense of but enough to know that there is actually a Pokemon called hypnos.

Evil hypnotists abound in Scooby Doo, here is a clip in which Daphne been hypnotized by an evil clown with a medallion.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0pKFLLzMDY

I wonder if the script writer had challenged himself to shoe in as many references to evil stereotypes as possible in one sketch – and of course the fact he chose the poor vulnerable Daphne deepens the impact.

Sarah Jane Adventures, the Junior version of Dr Who, recently had an episode where an entire school of children were hypnotized by looking at a band.

All of them without fail have the villain controlling the heroic characters. Ultimately the heroes always manage to break out of their trance, usually using distraction (a hypnotherapy technique for things such as pain management) to defeat the evil forces that threaten civilization as we know it.

So I have spent the rest of the time trying to subtly teach my children that hypnosis is actually a good thing, that it can’t control you and that in fact mummy goes to work and hypnotizes people every week. But sadly I’m no match for the hypnotic charms of Scooby Doo and the television.

And that’s the rub of it, watching television is a hypnotic act, so when, as children, we have watched programmes which incorporate evil hypnotists, we are at our most vulnerable at receiving messages. Children are still building up their belief systems and so anything they learn, especially one that has a consistent message, has even greater impact. Those messages which seem so benign and humorous are actually compounded and are being carrying forward as myths into adulthood.

Nearly every client I see that has come along because a friend has recommended it, knows that their friend talks sense and perhaps has seen the positive effect of hypnosis first hand, but still harbours the underlying apprehension that comes from watching or hearing these myths about hypnosis.

I see crossed arms and legs, people turning away from me in the chair – unable to look me in the eye. Comments such as “this is the last resort”, or “are you going to make me cluck like a chicken” are all things that I hear regularly. If I jest and say “it’s fine, I don’t have a medallion or anything like that”, I can see them instantly begin to relax in their chair.

Most clients are total converts after they experience it, comforted by the fact that they could open their eyes at any stage and the deep sense of relaxation following a session. Nearly all say they could stay there and just go to sleep.

But there is always someone who seems vaguely disappointed that I can’t make them cluck like a chicken, or make love to a broom….

Can a man comment on birth?

2009-08-05T11:31:00.003+01:00

Men and Birth. What really matters?

I was having a cup of tea and chat with my friend and neighbour last week, when he asked if I had read the piece on Sunday about drug free birth. I said "yes, I had", in a rather tired way! To be honest, some of the debate it had stirred up had irritated me somewhat. Basically, Denis Walsh had been quoted as saying that natural, drug free childbirth has distinct advantages over epidural deliveries.

A lot of the responses (including my neighbour's) was that Denis Walsh has no right to comment on women's experiences. Apparently, it is a woman's domain, and men aren't qualified to comment. So how come they are qualified to intervene, into delicate womanly parts with needles, tongs, machines, and all sorts of other paraphernalia. We don't question that! Is that because they are "rescuing" women from the drama and pain of this cursed condition called childbirth?

I don't know, but I totally support what Denis apparently said in the media. I am guessing that he was more likely to be quoted because he is a man, but ironically, then shouted down because he is a man. While birthing is most certainly a feminist issue - it is not whether you are a man or a woman that makes a difference - it is what your culture is saying about it that makes it a gender issue.

Both men and women can believe that childbirth is something we should feel slightly uneasy or disgusted about, very fearful about, that we should work to numb the experience as far as possible, and that it is yet another example of how a woman's body basically lets her down! (along with hormones, periods, breastfeeding and the menopause). She cannot birth without extreme pain or danger of death.

On the flip side, both men and women can believe that childbirth is something we should celebrate and admire, be proud of and in awe of. Isn't the ability to create a perfect new life something quite amazing? Shouldn't women be empowered and revered for that? And it doesn't stop there. As well as bring forth new life, women can sustain it, with their ability to produce life-sustaining milk, which is in fact perfect nutrition, comfort, medicine, vitamins, in a way which nothing else can!

If we were to adopt the latter viewpoint in our society, this might sit slightly uncomfortably for some people. I have had a few fathers in our classes come to me after and say "do you know what? It almost makes me feel a little like I'm missing out". To be able to celebrate womanhood and the wonder of birthing with due respect and admiration, rather than pity and mistrust, is, I believe, not easy for men or women in our society.

So, to be a man who can celebrate and see the wonder of being a birthing woman, in my eyes, makes him all the more worth listening to, not less. Hooray for Denis. He is not the only one of course - there are some great advocates out there - male and female. Michel Odent - my personal favourite, Ina Mae Gaskin, Sarah J Buckley to name a few. So, to summarise my reaction to the media coverage and reactions, I could write a long essay about the relevance of breaking a leg and needing anaesthesia, and the advantages of drug free birth etc, or i could just express my irritation with a quick comment that to chastise some body's professional opinion because he is a man is daft. Stop it!

Mia and Sophie
Hypnobirthing Practitioners

BA Hons, MSc Clin Psych, C.Psych, BABCP

Tel: 0845 508 2539

Email: info@mindfulmamma.co.uk
www.mindfulmamma.co.uk

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Birth but not as well know it....

2009-07-12T13:00:00.005+01:00

On Friday as I was leaving for work, I explained to my 5 year old that I was running a day teaching women how to give birth.

His reply was “well that's easy isn't it, you just need to relax.” Pleasantly surprised that all my work on birth had begun to see the growth of positive thoughts about birth, I smiled and said “yes that's right”. He continued, “you see I saw it on Scooby doo, and when the chicken relaxed the egg popped out. Easy.”

So not all my conditioning! But his response was interesting, it demonstrated how early our thoughts around the birth process are conditioned from a very young age. At Mindful Mamma we teach all our clients how important it is to relax and prepare, and of course when you are relaxed and prepared it can be great if you have no underlying fears or apprehensions surrounding birth.

However a large piece of research from Sweden recently showed that preparing with psychoprophilaxis (relaxation techniques) compared to those who hadn't showed no difference at all in outcomes.

This is hugely important for us hypnotherapists as we know that any underlying fears, whether it is of hospitals or needles, or simply that the mother feels threatened within her birth environment, can trigger the fight or flight response, which feeds into what is known as the fear-tension-pain cycle. As far as we know only preparing using hypnosis, particularly work around fear release, can break this cycle if there are any underlying apprehensions about birth.

Sadly in today's society we are conditioned to believe that birth is painful, that it's a medical process and that it can be dangerous from a very young age. I challenge you to find a birth in a film or a TV show that is not dramatic and fear inducing! We are not taught about how beautiful it is, how amazing our bodies are at adapting to birth physically, how the baby helps itself be born, and that actually the sensations and intensity you feel during birth are manageable. When you are free of fear, relaxed and calm your body does what it does naturally.

Imagine an animal in the wild giving birth, if she senses any threat, however small, she will automatically slow labour down. We are exactly the same, when giving birth our primal brain is bought into play, and we react as animals do. We need to disengage the chattering mind to just allow the birth to happen as other mammals do..

We set up the Mindful Mamma one day class to explore this and to teach couples to prepare for the birth they want, to learn they have choice, and to help dads understand how important their role and composure during birth is. In classes you can learn how to release your fear of birth, using hypnosis, to break the cycle of fear, even if it is subconscious, and then visualizations, self-hypnosis and mindfulness to keep mums in their birthing zone.

We have even taught midwives how the impact of their voice, gestures, presence can affect mum psychologically and physically. Amazing stuff!

More and more women are becoming aware of their potential to experience the birth they want, to feel empowered and in control. If you have any pregnant friends, pass this on – it may just get them thinking.

You can download birth MP3s or buy CDs from www.mindfulmamma.co.uk. All CDs are refundable when you book a class. Classes start at just £99 and are held between Newark and Grantham off the A1, in Nottingham, Leicester, Birmingham and Gloucester.

Trust your instinct when baby cries.

2009-04-03T13:53:00.003+01:00

Last week, I took my three year old, Kurtis, to his first swimming lesson. Even though he is my third, I was still excited. As I arrived, somewhat late (very little changes, even when you're on your third baby!) and when we approached the side of the pool ready to get in, the lesson had started. There was one child in the water, sobbing, and crying for his mummy, who watched anxiously from the side. He kept trying to wriggle out of the instructor's arms, looking over at mum, pleading and desperate.

Now, of course, I don't know that he was desperate. That is my interpretation. My interpretation would also be that we "should" listen to the child's distress and respond. I guess the mum's heart was telling herself that too - but for reasons of her own, she resisted that gut feeling. We are persuaded, often, in our society, to put our maternal instinct aside and the result is that mum hurts too. Luckily, that is changing, but only because science is now producing evidence that love and care are brain food for a baby. I decided that her way of doing things belongs to her, and my way is different. So I stayed on the side, waiting for my son to want to get in the water (I knew it wouldn't take long, because although he was anxious, he won't be able to resist for long.) I had done this with previous lessons, and of course, we do it when settling children in to nursery or pre-school too. Anyhow, after a couple of minutes, the instructor took him into the water, unwilling and beginning to cry, and asked me to move to the viewer's area because it was disrupting the class to have me there. I think she meant I was disrupting her, because the other mum in question had also come to the side, after over ten minutes of her child sobbing and appealing to her.

I wasn't happy to have him cry, so I hauled him out, comforted my distressed child, and left. As I was leaving, three mums came running out to me to comfort me. At some level, they get that this process hurts mums too. They "reassured" me that he would only sob for four or five sessions, and then he would love it. I felt the pressure to bow to an institutional system which I disagree with. I felt the sense of inadequacy that I was pandering to him, and that I had been a disruption to the smooth running of the class.

After we were dressed and leaving, the class was finishing. The child was still crying and sobbing. Half an hour must be a long time in a three year old's life. My boy skipped out of the room. Did he become "spoilt" in that he got his way? Who knows.

As parents, we are caught by two evolutionary driven systems. The system to conform to society and learn from others. This helps us work within our society and raise children who can function in it. It makes us sociable humans. But the maternal instinct sometimes works in opposition to the social system. The maternal instinct is to flush with pleasure when baby smiles, and to be distressed when baby cries or refuses food. I've had my fill of controlled crying (9 years ago when I blindly followed the advice of books) and of not sleeping with my baby (heightening my nocturnal anxiety about his welfare- that isn't neurosis, it's natural when separated from your baby). I'm so pleased things are changing with regards the advice coming out.

Why Love Matters is a book which summarises the science beautifully. But, and it is a big but, all advice can be interpreted as a "should". "Shoulds" put pressure on us, make us feel like others know better than us, and introduces the possibility of failure. There is very little out there to tell a mum to listen to her heart, her instinct, and her baby (we need a new version of Dr Spock). To love to love, for love's sake. Not for science's sake, or even baby's sake. If you do it for baby's sake, you forget to give yourself a break, and to realise that sometimes you just need a cup of tea on your own, and that is okay. If you do it because your heart tells you to, you do it genuinely, and, by the strangest coincidence, that is when your baby gets the most from it too.

So, I was quite proud of myself (after debriefing with two friends to help me make sense of my feelings) that I listened to my maternal instinct, and not societal pressure. Our classes and cd do give advice, but they also help you to listen to your heart, body and baby, during pregnancy, childbirth and beyond.

Whatever Happened to Trust?

2009-02-23T15:59:00.007Z

Last month I went to Germany for a trip with my sister. We decided to couchsurf which is when you register on the couchsurfing website and are able to contact people living in the place where you want to visit. They offer you a bed or a couch for free. Staying with complete strangers? Sounds risky?

If so ask yourself why. Is is media induced fear or based on real stories?

In fact the couchsurfing motto is “creating a better world, one couch at a time”. Similar to a hypnobirther I know who states “creating peace in the world, one birth at a time” !

I'm married with two kids, so it's not the sort of thing I do much any more – I am a little averse to risk with two toddlers in tow. But given the opportunity to enter into a bit of an adventure and get in touch with my inner teenager - I'm there.

So a few weeks ago Cherry, my sister, and I turned up at a family flat on the University Campus in Goettingen where our hosts Aline and Raubert had laid out coffee and biscuits for our arrival. This was a sign of things to come from this family who were such great hosts.

Aline and Raubert are from Brazil, a very different culture to me, so we got chatting, talking about all sorts of things, during which she asked me what I did. It turned out that her close friend Giovanna was leading a natural birth project in Brazil, but was living nearby on campus. For me that was a remarkable coincidence - this couchsurfing that I'd seen as a bit risky was turning out to be a wonderful and almost fateful experience.

Giovanna came over to visit on Saturday. She was a doula in Brazil where the caesarean rate is about 80% - women book their sections in to coincide with their manicures, facials and waxing. In certain part of Brazil, natural birth is disappearing altogether. Which is tragic.

Giovanna told me that her culture was rich with birth traditions which not only resided within the indigenous tribes but which came over with African communities. She was working to resurrect these traditions looking at the holistic approach to birth rather than a purely physical one. She viewed birth as a wonderful, spiritual, experience that people were missing out on. She understood that the switch to medical birth put babies at greater risk, and also jeopardised that bond between mother, child and the communities they live.

Giovanna was familiar with breathing and visualisation work – but unaware of the use of hypnosis which showed me how hypnosis and altered states are two things with just different labels when it comes birth. She even knew the opening blossom visualisation – though hypnobirthing is unheard of in the permaculture communities she works in.

The stories she told reminded me of something I'd heard about recently in Ecuador of a newly set up natural birthing centre in a hospital which was using a method called Gravity Birth. By reverting to natural birth and reintroducing their indigenous birth traditions they have managed to reduce the rate of caesarean sections from 18 to 8 percent, as well as the neonatal death rate from a national average of 19 per 1,000 to 7.8 per 1,000 births.

Finally, Giovanna showed me a closing ceremony which midwives perform, while chanting hypnotic songs, on the mother after the baby has been. By wrapping the mother up with a Rebozo and pulling it tight across spiritual centres, or Chakras as we know them, they are able to close the mothers body up spiritually following birth. Whilst Giovanna didn't know the songs she showed me the technique, which was incredibly calming, centering and relaxing. She told me that having had it demonstrated on her by local midwives she had felt wonderful and as if an inner balance had been restored.

Sadly we didn't have much more time together, but this trip did show me that by taking what we perceive to be risks within our existing belief systems, we can actually get in touch with memorable experiences that would have otherwise completely passed us by.

The story of Brazil, and their birthing culture, makes me realise how fortunate we are to have a culture where we still birth naturally but I'm also aware of just how vulnerable our birthing culture is to the process of medicalisation.

The future of birth is in our hands ladies. Trust in your body, trust in humanity, trust birth.

The womb is where it all begins...

2009-02-03T14:57:00.003Z

I've been playing den's with my children this week – a lot. They love den's, but don't all children and even adults? I have to admit I'm a bit claustrophobic but I do love curling up in a den every now and again.

This week we had a new fluffy red blanket which we draped over the den – it gave off a warm red glow inside. Rory my son, refused to come out and curled up into the corner, comfortable and calm. I too felt very at peace sitting in there with the sounds outside muffled and tucked up, cosily next to him.

The symbolism may be obvious, but what is so interesting is that after years of being born that I still now get that sense of peace and security when I'm in that den. Certainly I have no recollection of being in the womb, but I have a sense of it.

Often you will hear of people talk about birth memories, memories of being in the womb, or of a birth imprint or body memory. As adults we very seldom have a cognitive memory of being in the womb, rather we may have a sense of what that may have been like through games such as building, hiding out in dens or even listening to the muffled beat of a heart.

The unborn child is just like the newborn in that it is permanently learning and coming to terms with everything new in its environment. Things learned in the womb remain influential later in life. So hiding in dens, listening to the sound of the mother's heartbeat can have a calming effect even after birth.

On the other hand research looking into prenatal stress indicates that babies who that have suffered from stress in the womb have shown increased heart rates later in their lives. A study by Gerhard Rottmann (1974) suggested that the more conflict, ambivalence and rejection the mother demonstrated in her relationship with the unborn child, the more the child was affected after the birth.

In a study by Theodor Hau some of the things that were shown to be connected to the above were : less sleep, irritability, excessive screaming, apathy, underweight and gastrointestinal problems.

So what am I trying to say with this post? I suppose I want to get more to grips with this idea of body memory, of the feelings imprinted upon us in the womb and at birth and how that affects us as children and adults.

I have absolutely no doubt that the baby feels what the mother feels, and that's not just while they are in the womb. My children are acutely sensitive, they know when I am upset or down even if I hide it really really well. Being mindful of this and being present enables a mother to spend time with her child and to be calm and at peace. Benefiting not just herself but her child as well.

During pregnancy by remaining calm and relaxed, you are giving your baby the benefit of all those feel good hormones which we know affect them positively in the longer term. Babies that are born to mothers we have worked with are extraordinarily calm. In the longer term we are beginning to see the toddlers with remarkable focus and patience.

Here are 4 simple things that you can do everyday during your pregnancy to slow yourself down, relax and focus on the baby - If you are too busy then prioritise – ask yourself what is important in your life.

Take 10 minutes out of the day to meditate or reflect on your baby.
Practice slow belly breathing while listening to music
Talk to and play with your baby
Listen to the Mindful Mamma relaxation cd or some other relaxing music

To induce or not to induce?

2009-01-18T10:19:00.004Z

Imagine an apple tree, rich with fruit. There is one particular apple you need to get down, it looks red and juicy and ripe. You really want that apple and you want it now.

You've waited through winter, seen the blossom in the spring and now it's autumn and that apple is so big and round. It looks ready. You get impatient, every day you come out to the tree to see if the apple has fallen but it hasn't. Eventually one day you decide enough it enough, if that apple doesn't fall today then there must be something wrong with it. If it stays up there much longer it won't be as red and round and juicy. You have to give it a helping hand.

So the next day you shake the tree trunk with all your might, but the apple doesn't budge. In the end you think maybe if I climbed the tree I would get it sooner.

The tree is high, and you realise that if you were to climb the tree you would be tired, it would be hard work, you legs may get scratched and there is no guarantee you would reach it safely or the apple would be easy to pick once there.

So you sit under the tree to contemplate and reflect on your apple. You see the beauty of that apple so perfect in it's surroundings. You become still and patient under the tree, aware of the peace and quiet in this beautiful place, knowing deep down that the apple will fall from the tree when it is ready.

Then one day while you are quietly clearing the leaves from the grass around the tree the apple falls, right in front of your feet on a soft clump of moss. You bend down and lift it up, it's perfect without a blemish. You bite into that apple and are amazed at how perfectly sweet it is, that by leaving that apple to fall from the tree when it was time you let it ripen just as nature intended.

This is a symbolic visualization about induction.

The truth is though that inductions are rising - fast. Today Aberdeen University published figures which show that inductions are increasingly and unnecessarily being offered to mothers. Published on the BBC's website the study found that more than a quarter of cases there was no medical need for induction and that women were offered means of induction when there was no reason indicated. Sadly we also know that induced labours are associated with an increased likelihood of further medical interventions, such as caesarean section.

The researchers said that there did not seem to be a single explanation for the figures. In the study 32% of women had been given some form of induction, which is nearly a third. Do we really believe that a third of women are not able to go into labour naturally of their and the baby's own accord?

So why is this happening?

If anyone who has been on our classes is reading this they will be familiar with my thoughts on induction, however it still amazes me (and frustrates me) when we have birth reports where mums that are educated and knowledgeable are put under such immense pressure to have inductions. In fact one client recently was booked in for a sweep at 41 weeks when she was only 21 weeks pregnant!

It seems that they are all too quick to be made aware of the risks of going overdue, but are not made aware of the risks of induction, which very often leads to further interventions, on the baby.

In the UK we use a system called Naegele's Rule to calculate due dates. Franz Naegele was an obstetrician in the early 1800's and made his definition of due dates based on the premise that pregnancy lasted ten lunar months from the last menstrual period. It was not based on empirical data.

In the 1980s a researcher named Mittendorf in the US noticed that birth dates for women in his practice, primarily second-generation Irish-Americans, averaged seven days past their “due dates”. He reviewed his records, then went on to review records of 17,000 births, and determined the average healthy, private-care, first time mum averaged 288 days from (last Menstrual Period) LMP to birth: 8 days longer than Naegele’s rule.

Mittendorf and other researchers have further determined several factors that affect gestational term, including ethnicity, nutrition, substance use, mother’s age, and mother’s size. To calculate your due date base don Mittendorf try this:

(LMP – 3 months) + 15* Days = Due Date

* Add 10, rather than 15, if mother is non-white, or multiparous

In a study by Odutayo“Between 4% and 14% (average 10%) of women are prepared to reach 42 weeks gestation, and 2% to 7% (average 4%) to reach 43 weeks gestation depending on the population studied.” (Odutayo) In the overwhelming majority of these pregnancies, the foetus remains healthy, as does the mother.

And, according to American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology (ACOG), 95% of babies born between 42 and 44 weeks are born safely.

There is lots of research over the years which looks at percentages of babies born at 40 weeks, 41 weeks and so forth. An example from a midwife in a unit where they don't routinely offer induction and delivered 479 babies in a year was:

140 (29.2%) delivered between 40-41 weeks
105 (21.9%) delivered between 41-42 weeks
27 (5.6%) delivered between 42-43 weeks
1 went >43 completed weeks"

These figures were from a midwife led unit and are fairly consistent with other research that has been published, apart from the percentage over 43 weeks which is higher in controlled studies.

Impatience is sometimes the only reason for induction – coupled with fear arising from a lack of understanding of how your body works with your baby to bring on labour. Equally mums aren't aware of how important it is to allow those natural hormones to run their course, to give you a better and easier birth.

The baby will come when it's ready. When they do it will be wonderful and the birth will be better for it.

Breastfeeding wins hands down: Free MP3

2009-01-03T18:25:00.005Z

This week we have seen how Facebook is controversially banning pictures of breastfeeding mothers from Facebook. It says that they have received complaints and have literally hundreds of women have had photos removed from their profile.

Hard to believe when I was on my profile this morning with an advert at the right hand side of my profile displaying the naked torso of a muscular, photo shopped and tanned male body.

In protest mums have set up the Group called "Hey facebook: Breastfeeding is not Obscene" If you are a mum on Facebook and haven't come across the group I'd be amazed as it has a nearly 125,000 members already.

In protest mums have been posting themselves breastfeeding their babies as profile picture, but Facebook has no plans to change their existing policy, which I think is obscene.

What it has done though, amidst all the furore, is raised the profile of breastfeeding. It is an amazing feat of nature that we are able to produce everything our baby needs through our breast milk and more women should be supported in their choice to feed their babies. It is a wonderful, intimate experience that has untold benefits for mum and baby.

I fed both mine, although the first time it was extraordinarily challenging and it took about 6 weeks for me to get to grips with it. I'm sure I flashed a nipple more than once in public, but to be honest I didn't really care I was so absorbed in getting him latched on. My sister has her own carefully perfected technique of managing to feed while under a carefully constructed muslin tent. Which in the Debenham's cafe was a hoot. It just shows everyone has their own way, so trust in your instincts and find the way that is right for you.

I did nearly give up at four weeks and it was only sibling rivalry with my sister that kept me going. I was stressed, my boobs leaked and leaked, I got thrush, I bought the local shop out of cabbage leaves and when he had a growth spurt I was out of milk and I thought I'd had enough.

Then I learnt how stress can affect the let-down reflex and reduce your flow of milk whereas if you relax, take time and address your diet and fluid intake you can increase your milk flow. At the same time you will be helping your baby become less stressed and anxious in the longer term as children that are breastfed show lower levels of stress as children that have been bottle fed.

If you are struggling to feed, get help from groups such as the NCT or La Leche League. There are even independent breastfeeding counsellors such as Denise Pemberton at Feeding Baby who parents have said, have turned feeding around in a couple of hours.

Breastfeeding protects both you and your baby. Research shows that it can reduce the risk of breast cancer, ovarian cancer, hip fractures and increase bone density. Amongst the innumerable health benefits to baby outline by UNICEF it is also now thought to improve neurological development in a newborn.

Listen to Mindful Mamma's FREE MP3 to build confidence in breastfeeding and to help you relax and enjoy the experience.

Happy feeding!

New Year and New Beginnings

2009-01-02T14:31:00.004Z

Happy New Year! New Year often brings change, as does a new baby. However, with a new baby, we don't always come equipped with the right psychological experience!

We tend to be good at focussing on one job at a time, perfecting it, succeeding in it, getting praised for it, and moving onto the next - whether we are passing exams, cooking a meal, or going shopping. A baby warrants very different skills.

A parent needs to be instantly interruptible, highly responsible, very self sacrificing, and often without any adult support to hand. A friend once said to me "I've done nothing all day! I've not even put the washing out." I said, "you have nurtured and cared for that little one all day, a job which no-one else can do as well as you, because you are his mother".

If you doubt how important nurture and holding is for your baby, read Sue Gerhardt's book "Why Love Matters".

I have been interrupted three times writing this (so far). Twice to cuddle my three year old (he is tired) and once to stop the tea from burning. It's taken me nine years to learn to be instantly interrruptible without frustration. Sometimes, I even feel gratitude - because I am lucky enough to him for my children to come to me and ask for that special thing. A cuddle.

If you sometimes wonder whether you are as important as a mum, as you are in your career, read Naomi Stadlen's "What Mothers Do - especially when it looks like nothing". It's a nice boost when you feel useless.

There are two things which will help you adjust to the changes. One is the temperament of your baby. Time and time again, our parents tell us how calm their baby is. By listening to our cds regularly, you are releasing calming hormones to your baby through the placenta.

This affects the brain development of your baby. Also, a calm birth makes for a calmer baby - though science has yet to research and demonstrate this important phenomena. Our classes are designed to help you get your calmest birth possible.

The second thing which will help you adjust to being a parent is the attachment and love that you feel for your baby. Dealing with a sudden mid-night waking is a lot easier if your heart can melt when you see the cause of your exhaustion! Our classes help you to prepare for parenthood by looking at ways of adjusting to your baby's existence, and developing a relationship with your baby before he or she is even born.

So, if you have been trying to get your pregnant friends to join our classes, and they aren't sure, just remind them that it isn't all about the birth - it's mostly about the baby!

Whatever adjustments and challenges your New Year brings, I hope you really enjoy them!

Mums recognise the cry of naturally born babies.

2008-09-05T17:02:00.001+01:00

At Mindful Mamma we already know that mums who delivered naturally are responsive to their babies, and that babies born vaginally are known bond quicker and feed better. But this study, which has been widely reported, left us thinking there are perhaps more environmental factors which influence how a mother responds to their baby's cry and the emotional bond they feel with their baby. We find that women who have prepared well, are able to make informed choices and who feel empowered by their births respond well to their baby whatever their birth and feel that they had a positive birthing experience.

Lack of response to the baby is often linked to post natal depression and guilt that the mother hasn't been able to give her baby a "perfect birth". In the study by Dr. James Swain, Child Study Centre, Yale University it isn't clear how the women were chosen, what sort of birth preparation they had, nor the circumstances under which they had a caesarean. So it really isn't the full picture.

The study published yesterday has found that mothers who delivered vaginally compared to caesarean section delivery (CSD) were significantly more responsive to the cry of their own baby, identified through MRI brain scans two to four weeks after delivery.

The results of the study published today in The Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, suggest that vaginal delivery (VD) mothers are more sensitive to hearing their own baby-cry in the regions of the brain that are believed to regulate emotions, motivation and habitual behaviours.

A caesarean is a surgical procedure, in which delivery occurs via incisions in the abdominal and uterine wall. It is considered necessary under some conditions to protect the health or survival of infant or mother, but it is controversially linked with postpartum depression. In the US the occurrence of CSD has increased steeply from 4.5% of all deliveries in 1965 to a recent high in 2006 of 29.1%. In the UK the figure is slightly lower at around 23% - this varies from hospital to hospital.

The critical capacity of adults to develop the thoughts and behaviours needed for parents to care successfully for their newborn infants is supported by specific brain circuits and a range of hormones. The experience of childbirth by VD compared with CSD uniquely involves the release of oxytocin from the posterior pituitary, uterine contractions and vagino-cervical stimulation. Oxytocin is a key mediator of maternal behaviour in animals. You produce additional amounts of Oxytocin during the birth and after the birth the rush of love is linked to a rush of Oxytocin.

"We wondered which brain areas would be less active in parents who delivered by caesarean section, given that this mode of delivery has been associated with decreased maternal behaviours in animal models, and a trend for increased postpartum depression in humans," said lead author Dr. James Swain, Child Study Centre, Yale University. "Our results support the theory that variations in delivery conditions such as with caesarean section, which alters the neurohormonal experiences of childbirth, might decrease the responsiveness of the human maternal brain in the early postpartum."

The researchers also looked into the brain areas affected by delivery conditions and found relationships between brain activity and measures of mood suggesting that some of the same brain regions may help regulate postpartum mood. So this may have an impact on postnatal depression.

At Mindful Mamma we teach you to trust and have confidence in your birthing body, so the risk of caesarean is significantly reduced if you have prepared well for birth emotionally and practically. HypnoBirthing mums have an average of 9% of caesareans compared with a national average of 23%. Those mums who have delivered by caesarean have demonstrated a positive response to their baby knowing that they had the best birth possible and even the preparation they undertook, kept them connected with their baby who had the psychological and neurological benefit of reduced levels of cortisol in the womb while mum took time to relax during her pregnancy.

Baby brain? More like baby brainpower.

2008-10-27T15:18:00.003Z

At last some research that proves we aren't getting more forgetful or succumbing to that urban myth called baby brain but that in fact we are adapting to a boost in brain power and a change in how our brain alters itself so that we can become even better at multi tasking!

Researchers in the US found that contrary to the popular view that having children reduces a woman's brainpower, having children actually improves her lifelong mental agility and protects her brain against the neurodegenerative diseases of old age.

The research was carried out by Dr Craig Kinsley, professor of neuroscience at the University of Richmond, Virginia, and colleagues, and will be presented at the Society for Neuroscience 2008 conference which is to take place from 15 to 19 November in Washington DC.

Kinsley said that while a woman may experience an apparent loss of brain function while she is pregnant, this could be because parts of her brain are being remodelled in preparation for dealing with the complicated demands of childrearing.

"The changes that kick in then could last for the rest of their lives, bolstering cognitive abilities and protecting them against degenerative diseases," said Kinsley, according to a Times Online report.

A number of studies have reported that women appear to reduce their memory and reasoning ability when they are pregnant. But Kinsley and colleagues suggest this is a temporary result of the remodelling that is going on, which in the long term boosts the woman's brainpower beyond what she had before she was expecting.

The researchers studied rats and primates and compared the brains and skills of females with and without offspring. As well as physical brain differences, they found that females with offspring were braver, could find food up to five times more quickly, and had better spatial ability than females without offspring.

Among the physical differences in the brains of mothers versus non-mothers, the researchers found that nerve cells in parts of the brain important for tending to offspring were larger and more richly connected to other cells. The mothers' brains also showed newly formed clusters of cells that the researchers referred to as "maternal circuits".

Although most studies like this are done on animals, said Kinsley, it's likely that human women will also have similar benefits because the same regions of the brain are used in maternal behaviours.

Lead researcher Professor Helen Christensen told AFP:

"It really leaves the question open as to why [pregnant] women think they have poor memories when the best evidence we have is that they don't."

So next time someone says you have baby brain, you can think great, my mind is even sharper than ever!

Does preparation really help? Of course it does!

2008-09-09T09:56:00.000+01:00

Hot on the heels of the research earlier this week comes another linked to preparation and postnatal depression. Several studies have already identified the link between preparation and reduced risk of postnatal depression in both the father and the mother and we know from our work that mums who feel more prepared, empowered and confident about the birth, and who have bonded well with their baby prenatally, are less likely to experience postnatal depression.

This new study published in The Journal of Perinatal Education finds first-time mothers want more information about how a newborn will impact their lives. Thirty-five percent did not feel prepared for the physical experience following birth and 20% did not feel prepared for the emotional experience.

The study includes 151 first-time mothers attending community child health centers in Brisbane, Australia. Focus groups were conducted with eight mothers 7-9 months following entry to the service. Nearly half commented on some aspect of maternal health such as fatigue, postnatal depression and the work of caring for a new baby.

The situation in the UK may not be much different, prental check ups do little to prepare you for the birth or for parenthood. Some classes such as the National Childbirth Trust are great for knowledge and parenting skills but do not cover the tackle the emotional aspects as deeply. Even the NHS parentcraft classes don't really do what they say on the tin. They are often packed, we have reports of up to 20 couples in a class, or parents have difficulty getting a place. Sometimes people just need some time to reflect and be able to air their concerns or to ask questions.

This is what one dad had to say about our one day mindful mamma class

“I would just like to commend you on designing and running such a really fantastic course! It really has empowered both of us,to the point where most of our fears about birth have disappeared already. We have always wanted to go down the natural birth route, but felt that there was not enough support & advice out there about how to do it drug and pain free. Your course, although short, covered pretty much all aspects that I felt were missing from our antenatal classes & many more. Vic now feels a lot more confidant, and I actually feel like I have a proper role in the whole event, other that driving her to the hospital & sitting on the rocking chair!"

"The Australian study demonstrates that new mothers are eager for high-quality, accurate information of what to expect of life with a newborn," says the study's lead author, Margaret Barnes, RN, MA, PhD.

Mindful Mamma classes can empower women to have positive birth experiences and with additional services we can support confidence with parenthood, breastfeeding, handling tiredness and so on.

So how can you be a mindful mamma?

2008-08-31T20:35:00.000+01:00

This summerI decided to go the extra mile and rashly booked myself on a buddhist retreat led by Thich Nhat Hahn,(Tay) the Zen Master nominated by Martin Luther King for the Nobel Peace Prize. Rather oddly it was being held in Nottingham - so I felt it was too good an opportunity to miss.

His approach to Buddhism is based on mindfulness in Western society. I practise meditation and try to mindful but it is a challenge with a business and two small children so I thought that Tay could show me where the holy grail of mindfulness exists.

So I bundled my two children aged 3 & 4 into a car, with my mother, and whizzed off for a week of noble silences and mindfulness. What was I thinking? Does the universe truly send us lessons to learn - if so this was a week I wouldn't forget. The first two days the children had a tummy bug, there was nowhere that I could contain the children and there was no tv to give a desparate mum a break. To add to the challenge we had to keep the children calm and occupied while near on 700 people were practising silence for the week.

I don't think I have ever faced a tougher challenge. After frustration, tears shed and two very lively explorative children things started to settle. Only able to talk to the children in quiet voices, they reacted more calmly. In fact I don't think I raised my voice once during the week.

Without external distractions I was able to focus on them more closely and respond differently. I sensed that the children sensed this and it became transformative. Ok so they didn't eat their meals in silence, but they sat down whispered, ate well and drank water for a week. Not a glass of blackcurrent in sight-nor did they ask.

When Tay came into a talk, Fin, my 4 year old, whispered "I like him a lot" and just settled. It made me think about how by being mindful, aware and focussed in the present moment I should be able to see a reflection of that tranquilty in my son.

We learnt some fantastic, simple meditations that can be used before school or work that I'll be doing with him as he starts school this week.

Mia and myself will be adapting some of the wonderful meditations for our Mindful Mamma classes. These meditations can help you contemplate the miracle of birth and your role as a mum to be - understanding that you and your behaviour is reflected in the baby growing inside you - that by being emotionally strong, calm and tranquil you have the space to grow peacefully through your pregnancy and birth and to be at one with your baby.

Be mindful that during the birth not just a baby is born, but a mother and a father are born too.

And so did Tay show me the holy grail mindfulness? Perhaps not but it certainly set me off on a more mindful journey to discover it.

Have a mindful day!

Do babies feel pain?

2008-07-27T22:06:00.000+01:00

Not so long ago, new born babies were operated on without anaesthetic, because it was believed that their brains were too immature to register pain. They were slapped, hung upside down, rubbed vigorously with rough towels, and more. Nowadays, we know that babies feel pain, and that they remember birth. They are beings right from the start. Science is now beginning to explore this rich arena. It seems that babies are communicating as soon as they enter our world of light, air and gravity. Our sociability is with us from the beginning. When watching the birth videos in class (and of course, I have watched them quite a lot!) I notice more and more that the babies’ cries are communicating. How do I know? Because their cries change. I can hear the increase in crying when a voice in the room becomes raised. I can hear the “sniffling” of a baby beginning to feel soothed when in mum’s arms. Knowing you can soothe your baby is a wonderful feeling for a mum and dad. Seeing your baby suffer is a horrible feeling for a mum and dad. As HypnoBirthing has always said, nature guides us. She ensures that what feels right, is indeed right. So, as a new mum and dad, you have authority and permission to ensure that your baby’s cry is heard, and that you can begin to listen and soothe your baby as soon as he enters your world.

Does a Textbook HypnoBirth really exist? Well yes, I saw one!

2008-07-27T22:01:00.000+01:00

I often say in class, that your midwife may underestimate your progress in labour, as she has not got the “normal” signs to follow that she is used to (such as discomfort, pain, fear, vomiting, and the dreaded “transition” phase). I say this because I often hear mums tell me that their midwife didn’t realize how advanced she was, and I experienced it with my third baby. (The midwife said I wasn’t in labour as I didn’t have that “glow” about me, and I delivered within hours). Well, I have to take this opportunity to tell you that I saw it for myself recently when I had the honour of being at a birth. At the first vaginal examination, the midwife was very surprised to find that mum was fully dilated. Mum knew this deep down, but it was lovely for her to hear confirmation too. And she went on to have her beautiful 9lb baby with no pain medication at all. I don’t normally talk about textbook births, because every birth is unique, and different, and they go in different ways, with or without intervention – and every birth, no matter what happens, is one which every mum and dad should be very proud of. I know that this mum and dad are very proud. And so was I!

Forget the drugs – skin to skin works

2008-07-27T22:00:00.000+01:00

Skin-to-skin contact, or kangaroo mother care (KMC) has been shown to be efficacious in diminishing pain response to heel lance in full term and moderately preterm neonates," write Celeste Johnston, DEd, RN, from McGill University School of Nursing in Montreal, Quebec, Canada, and colleagues. An awful lot of money has gone towards demonstrating what we all know in our hearts. If you cuddle your baby when they are in pain, you reduce the pain. Kangaroo mother care is a fancy term for holding your premature baby a lot, in preference to putting her in an incubator. Attempts have been made to make incubators mimic mother’s care – by making them warm (but they aren’t as good at regulating baby’s temperature as holding is) by making them smell like mum (but not as effective as mum holding baby - obviously), and by making them move like mum (but not as effective as mum carrying baby). It wasn’t until there was no money for expensive incubators that hospitals in Brazil “tried” letting mums hold babies while they recovered from their premature birth. It soon became apparent that holding is more healthy and healing than incubators (in other words, fewer babies died). Another thumbs up for mother nature!