So Who's the Professional Here?

This months blog is courtesy of one of my recent clients, a couple were constantly coming up with great ideas to support the birth that they wanted. Thanks for letting me use this for the blog!

We have talked a lot about the law of attraction and the importance of a women trusting in her instincts about how and where she wants to birth. In one of their sessions, this mum to be mentioned that she had been fending off comments from colleagues at work who questioned her choices about the homebirth she wished to have by telling her "you need to be where it's safe", "in a hospital surrounded by professionals." She turned to them and said" But I am a professional"!

Brilliant. And of course she's right. Women are 100% qualified for the job of giving birth! A woman giving birth, can tune into her body, is able to instinctively move to help her baby's journey and will often know what she or the baby needs. Just listening to that inner voice, the subconscious, allows the mother to let go consciously and for instinct to take over.

Control is often an issue that come up in classes when we talk about letting go, but it's not about losing control. There is no doubt that people come to our classes because they want to feel in control, it's obvious to us that there is a real issue around losing control, whether it's the birthing mother thinking that she will lose control of herself or either the mother or her partner's fear of losing control to medical teams over the course of the birth.

This is interesting to us, because it demonstrates the sense of threat that is triggered by the instinctive need to be in control, to be alert, armed and aware. This threat is actually the one thing that really can inhibit the process of birth as it keeps the conscious mind, engaged and alert when really it should be slumbering. It's also a response that is triggered by the need to protect the baby and suggests "If I am not in control of the situation how can I protect my baby".

What our classes teach you is how to become more consciously aware of what those threats are prior to the birth and to build the confidence of you and your birthing partner. They also teach that control is paradoxically about allowing yourself to let go. Every woman in the birthing room chooses whether she can give herself over the birthing body, but when she does give herself over to the birthing body, who is in control? Yes, she is of course!

Trusting that the subconscious contains everything you need to birth gently, and that the conscious mind, the logical mind, has been allowed to just drift off for a while is about feeling secure in your knowledge of the birth process and the belief that you know how to birth.

Remember, every woman births differently and you are the absolute professional when it comes to your birth!

Peace on Earth Begins with Birth

"When I was pregnant, I knew I trusted nature’s way, and that I didn’t want drugs or intervention. Our classes are designed to help you if you feel the same way. However, myself and a lot of “my” mums do accept Syntometrine – the injection that comes after baby is born to help the placenta come out nice and quickly. After your baby has been born, you’re on such a high and relieved, that you don’t care. And I remember thinking “well, baby isn’t getting any of it, so what the heck”.

When people ask my advice about taking Syntometrine, I usually sit on the fence, because there isn’t the research out there to support any views that I might have on it. Until now. There was one time however, when a mum looked at me just after she had had her baby, and said “shall I just have it?” I said “you have done so amazingly, doing this completely naturally, do you really want a drug now?” in a kind of “are you crazy” tone of voice. She declined. I surprised myself – I don’t usually throw my opinion on my clients. I guide and help them make their own decision. But I knew this woman – she had worked so hard, with such grace and determination, that I simply knew it wasn’t the right choice for her.

In class, I sometimes say that if you have birthed your baby completely naturally, why not go the whole hog, and stay natural? I also sometimes say that IN THEORY it could affect your oxytocin levels – but there is no research out there to support that. Until now.

Research has now come out of the Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology to suggest that Syntometrine might impact on breastfeeding rates 48 hours after birth. This makes so much sense. If you inject synthetic oxytocin into your system, your brain registers its presence, and tones down the amount that it generates naturally. As you know if you have come to our classes, natural oxytocin is the love hormone – important for bonding and breastfeeding. Synthetic oxytocin doesn’t cross the blood brain barrier, and so all it does is help the uterus clamp down.

So, as time goes on, and as research monies are used to assess nature over intervention, it seems to me that nature wins every single time. Nature really is amazing. So what I don’t get, as a psychologist, is why almost every culture intervenes? What is that about? Why have we got such a determination as a culture to get in there and make a mess of what nature does so beautifully? Are there any benefits of this, that have evolved over time? Michel Odent is the only person I know to even ask this (apart from some feminists maybe) and he has a fascinating suggestion. He argues that interrupting the process of birth creates a more aggressive society. You “imprint” individuation and aggression on the brain, in place of trust, cohesion and love. So, the cultures which interrupt nature’s way on a regular basis, create better human machines for ambition, drive and warfare. Cultures which don’t interrupt nature’s way create cohesive, loving, trusting groups that may get overturned like dodos did. My children are studying vikings at school. I would love to know how the Vikings birthed their children. One day, I might get time to find out more about it! In the meantime, have a wonderful, peaceful Christmas, knowing that we can trust nature to keep us all peaceful and loving!

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